Can't Afford To Stay

Can’t Afford to Stay

Baby, it seems like this is the end of the road for us, I swear I don’t want it to be,
But I feel like there’s nothing else to do but move one and let go of you and me.
I’ve done all that I can do and you’ve said everything that u could say
And as much as its gone costs me to leave, I just can’t afford to stay.

The kids, the house and all that we’ve built aint enuf to make it last,
Were drifting around this empty, emotionless relationship waiting on the inevitable to pass
You’re hating me more and more each day and at the same time I’m resenting you.
Believe me, on all that I love, I wish there something more that we could do.
Some days I look at you and wonder what happened to the tender girl that I knew.
And what has become of the kind man that once fell in love with you.
I look into your eyes, hoping I could make it better knowin that I can’t
And it tears me up inside cuz im feelin like half a man
Nothing else to do, nothing else to say
As much as it costs to leave, I just can’t afford to stay

People see us in the streets, our fake smiles, not knowing when we go home
We are sleeping in separate rooms, quiet and alone
Divorce was never an option. Splitting up was never supposed to be.
That was the path for everyone else…unheard of for you and me.
Remember, we were supposed to talk about everything, we were supposed to work it out.
We said that we’d bend over backwards and compromise without a doubt.
We made promises to GOD that we would live and love through him
and that we’d keep our relationship private and not let anyone in.
Where did we go wrong? How did we go astray?
It costs too much to leave, but baby I can’t afford to stay.

You started listening to your friends, I started hangin with the guys.
Me, drinkin my pain away, while you were living with the lies.
When I looked into your eyes, I thought we had it all.
If love was a height, we were more than ten feet tall
The arguments, the cursing and the fighting, when did it all begin
How did this nightmare become the ending to an endless end
I said I’d never yell. You started to scream. Somehow we lost that fight to get thru anything
Now you hangin out all late….cell phone starting to buzz
Trying to avoid the questions about u being on the scene wit cuz
I can’t be mad at u baby, I know that I’m not there, I wish I could reverse the pain and tears we both share
Nothing left to do. even less to say.
It cost me so much to leave, but I just can’t afford to stay.

I hear you on the phone wit yo girls, tellin em “he aint shit”.
And that u’ll be glad that this is done, glad to get it over wit.
I tried to be ur superman, I never meant to bring you pain.
We were supposed to rule the world, me and my Lois lane
If I could turn back the time I would. Reverse the sadness and tears
I’d give you back the time we lost. Ever second of ever year.
Hug me one last time. Fight the tears. I can’t stand to see you that way.
It’s time for us to separate cuz I can’t afford to stay.

The Ugly Phase

About once every few months, I decide to try to let my hair grow out, just to try something different. Sometimes I get tired of the same look, the typical dark ceasar.
And each time I journey into the hair unknown, I have to say to myself, be patient...don't cut it off. A few weeks may go by,where if I'm lucky I'll just get an edge up and feel some sort of success. But then, my hair will get to the point where the edge up doesn't really save it. It doesn't take the eyes off of the fact that my hair has become fuzzy in the back and no matter how often I brush it, it won't lay flat. This is the beginning of what we call "the ugly phase". The ugly phase is the accepted transition that must take place during hair growth. Your hair will get to a stage where its not short enough to manage, yet not long enough to do what the end result is requiring it to do. Its ugly. Plain and simple.
And u have to accept it and still continue to groom it, knowing that the only way to get it where u ultimately want it to go is to give it the attention that it deserves, no matter how it looks. U have to he patient with it. U must accept it for what is. And when people ask you about it, you have to be able to just say, "I'm letting it grow. This is not the end result. Check back with me in 3 months and it'll look great."
Eventually with consistent washing and conditioning and grooming, your hair will indeed grow faster and faster, to eventually grow long enough to where you can style it, cut it, braid it or curl it to your liking. Many people want to achieve the long, full hair result, but not many are patient enough to go through the ugly phase, in order to get where they really want to be.
So, just like most people, I always end up cutting my hair, right when it gets to the ugly stage because it is not what I envisioned, nor does it look good.

In saying all that, this is how so many of us treat our relationships. We give up when they get to the ugly phase. In the beginning, when things are manageable and problems are small, things are great, comprimising is not an issue and we are just so much in love. Then, as time goes on, the infatuation has died, the passion isn't what it once was, the dirty clothes begin to pile up, and all of a sudden, comprimise is a little slower and understanding is just a punchline.
We lose sight of the end result for the current state, the ugly phase. We go from, till death do us part, to just let me get thru today. We've been warned and we know full well that storms will come and that relationships don't have a blueprint.
u have two constantly growing people trying to grow as one. Its not meant to be easy! The ugly phase is a necessary transition in a relationship, just as with hair growth. If u want a fuller, healthier, longer relationship that is worthy of admiration, u have to accept the ugly phase for what it is...a necessary transition to where you want to be. Embrace the ugly stage, make fun of it, allow it to grow widly, and teach you how to manage the unknown. In doing so, u'll appreciate the end result of a fulfilling relationship.
So if u encounter someone all up in your business, questioning "why r u with him, or why r u with her", answer, were going thru the ugly phase. Check back with us in 12 months.

Negroes Still Achieving

Negroes Still Achieving

Is your motivation to make a dollar or to make a difference?
Are you sacrificing to make a statement or just sliding by to remain an inference?
Far too often in these times we look through the forest for the trees,
losing focus by what we can become, rather than living by what we truly believe.
You can spend a lifetime on this earth and not amount to one thing….understanding the difference
between accomplishing a dream or just copping’ some bling.
Negroes still achieving is about enhancing the circumstance of others by what you do, realizing that the benefit of your labor is bestowed up them, not wasted on you.
Negroes still achieving is about a passion to advance.
The foresight of the blind but faithful, to claim the future and not leaving it to chance.
All that remains is yet, but a mystery.
The Negroes who gave their lifetime for achievement have become celebrated Black History.